My oldest girls have returned to their respective boarding schools, and my two, youngest children were supposed to go back to their school, following Spring Break - today...but. We got enough snow last night, that school was cancelled for the day...which I thought would mean - there would be no way in hell that I'd get any new self-portraits...for like the millionth freaking day in a row...*sigh*
However...when my kids started making plans with their friends to go sledding - I got an idea. I decided that while they were out frolicking in the snow, I would fill the brief quiet time by snapping a few self-portraits, featuring the one sled in the house that I knew neither of them would want to use - our all but forgotten, dusty old, Flexible Flyer.
There was nothing particularly difficult about this shoot, per se...the temperature had risen so much, that I actually got hot moving around wearing so...much...blessed...clothing (the good news about that was, I didn't havta worry about getting caught naked in public - score!), it wasn't physically grueling in the slightest (I felt almost like a wimp, having allowed myself the luxury of incorporating footwear into the costume) - but what did make this shoot just the teensiest bit nerve-racking, was the fact that so many people watched me as I worked...and consequently looked at me as if I was some sort of raving lunatic......people like: the teenagers who were sledding on the same hill, but a little way's away...and the folks who went past me while they were walking their dogs...my ex-husband's girlfriend who drove by, honked, waved, and lastly - rolled her eyes (awesome), and one policeman who was making his rounds.
This type of reaction is precisely what's made me so apprehensive about going out into my new neighborhood to take selfpics - even clothed! There are simply so many more eyeballs in the city, than there were in the county - that will see, and judge me for what I do (many of whom will actually recognize me!) I guess it's just gonna take some time before I build up the confidence that I'll need if I'm to continue making my pics. here, while also making a complete horse's ass outta myself...in some people's eyes, at least...